That fateful day

It was January 7. Just the beginning of a year. And the new year hangover was yet to die down. But deep within there was some unrest, may be divinely ordained for things to come. The fateful morning led us all to the family doctor to have Maa's check up done because of a mouth ulcer (in the tongue) that was showing no signs of healing. The ulcer was, as the doc said, fiercely staring. The last time, he had seen the same ulcer was two months back and he had assumed it to be a normal one that happens because of stress and strain. Not unlikely for Maa since she was tensed for something or the other at home.

She had retired as a school teacher and gave all her time to the home. All the more engrossed in making papa's life easy since he is almost bedridden post a spine surgery. At times, he is unable to walk even a step and its Maa who helps him urinate with the help of a bucket in the bedroom and then disposes it of in the toilet. And this happens at least thrice at the mid of night. Imagine, the amount of sleep she must be getting over all these nights!

We were asked to go for a smear test at the nearest hospital, the sooner the better, the doc warned. We were two of us with Maa, me and my brother, elder to me by a year and a half. Our heart sank. We feared the worst. Its normal, pretty normal to think negative when you are slightly well read and know about the repercussion of such wounds that dont heal despite medication for over a month. Homeopathy, allopathy, mouth washes and vitamin supplements – nothing worked.

The test was painful because the tongue was scrapped time and again to collect samples. Maa managed to bear it all. My brother went back home with Maa and I came back to office. The report was supposed to come in three hours. But there was so much of mixed reactions – one that suggested the reports would be normal and another that threatened of a carcinogenic ulcer, no idea whether benign or malignant. At one point I felt time should fly and at others I wished three hours should change into three years...and it actually made me feel like three years!!! with the eyes almost stuck on the watch. I was looking at the cell phone every second expecting my brother's call, and hours passed by. These hours were harrowing. I was in office and it was difficult to control the emotions.

The wait finally ended with a phone ring, it was my brother's. I took some time before picking up and gathering myself with all strength - to listen to the good or maybe the worse. It was the worse! It was Oral cancer but a biopsy was required to confirm. My brother wanted me to be right there with him at the hospital. But I was crying inconsolably even without realizing that I was in office, right in my desk with one my pages opened, half made. Two of my colleagues next to me didnt know what was wrong but yes, they knew something was really bad.

I left office and by the time I reached the doctor, thoughts and more thoughts crowded my mind. But reality had to be faced and I and my brother needed to be strong enough to face Maa and Papa, to convince them that we can fight it out together. At the moment, breaking the news to them was all the more important. We had to, sooner the better, since Maa had to be taken to an oncologist immediately. So both of us put up a brave face and reached home. It seemed, they had guessed it right but weren't ready to accept.

We knew a battle had just begun, Maa in the lead followed by all of us, her own and many, who were more than her own. And we decided to fight, a fight that had just begun, with the hope of coming up trumps, soon.