Reconnections & recollections

I got a call from Arundhati after a long time. She sounded happy and wanted to meet me. After her usual questions about how I am and my parents are, she came to the point. ``I want to tell you something, can we meet?'' I knew she would talk about something that she has not been able to share with anyone else. ``Of course we can but it has to be on a lean day for me so that I dont rush back to work,'' I said.

In two days' time, I was already seated in the nearest coffee outlet when I saw Aru, (as I normally address her) getting into the cafe in her usual carefree style of dressing and complementing it with ethnic neckpiece and bangles. ``Hello, how are you?'' she said giving me a hug. Since I was eager had little time, I asked her if she wanted cold coffee or hot and poked her to tell me what she wanted to.

Very straight in her approach, Aru said what I feared always. She was once again in love. This was not the first time that Aru was telling me about a boy or a man, that she has been hooked to. I smiled to ask her back, ``is it something serious?'' ``Yeah, very serious,'' she sighed.

Aru met this guy after an interregnum of 20 years. A teenager in late 90s, she had spent close to four years of friendship with him when he used to frequent their house as the son a family friend. He was studying in the college where, Aru's father was a professor. So his visits were a regular affair and everyone in the house, including her mom, wanted him to be around at least in the evenings to have some home cooked food as he was a hostelite. The visits soon had blossomed into a bond, a bond that cannot be defined or given a name, Aru had told me years back on a casual reference. ``Actually I never knew he was madly in love with me. In my school days, he used to stare at me for hours, spend time only with me for long, gave me flowers, supported me even when I was wrong, consoled me when I cried, tried to teach me maths in which I was poor, but I would never pay any heed to what he taught, he would wake up in the morning and rush into my room to have a look at me.''

I could understand what Aru was trying to tell me. So I asked her, how could she know that he was in love with her.

``With time obviously and his behavioural changes,'' Aru explained. ``Somehow I got an inkling that he wanted me as his life partner, but I was not prepared for committing to a relationship at that stage. I had just completed my Plus Two from school and got admitted into a college. I read some of his love poems, he writes very well, and found that my guess was correct. He was very close to me but I had never thought of him as my life partner, In fact, my parents and his parents also wanted the relationship to grow. But I knew it was too early in life and I was meeting many friends at college who also professed their love for me. Not that I was very beautiful, but there was something in me, which I dont know, attracted many. Who knows, I might choose any of those as a life partner,'' I had thought then.

``So what happened now?'' I asked surprised at why she had raked up a 20-year-old story now. Aru explained, ``We met through Facebook once again and became friends. He has also visited me a few times. Though I have forgotten all about him, he has refreshed my memory. Everything is so well etched in his mind. He is well settled now and still feels his life is incomplete without me.''

``Crazy?? Doesnt he know that you are married and have a child?''

``He knows, but he doesnt want to marry me as well. He also has a family and a child and is doing well in life. All he wants is to revive the same fondness and respect that each one of us had for each other. And not at the cost of our respective families' happiness. He chats with me for hours and speaks to me over phone at times, that is all,'' Aru said wryly.

After Aru had refused to marry him, he was disheartened and lost all hopes in life. He was shattered. Though he continued higher studies in management in the same city, he never returned to Aru because he didnt want to impose anything on Aru or emotionally make her bow to his love. ''I come to know this now, when he explained why he didnt keep in touch after his graduation. He also told his wife before marriage about his love for me and gave her all freedom to say a NO if she didnt want to marry him,'' Aru explained.

``Are you in love with him,'' I asked.

``Am not too sure, its just three four months that we have started talking to each other. But I have no ill feelings towards him, he had never tried to impose himself on me even when I was too young, never came close to me, neither does he want anything from me now. He just wants to be in touch with me for the rest of his life if its ok with me,'' Aru said filled with emotions. I could see that glint of sorrow in her eyes and also felt, she was in love with the guy even though she is not open about it. Maybe in another few months, she might actually profess her love for the person.Aru, as I know her is bad at breaking hearts.

Aru married the person she had loved and both had a happy and content life. As far as I knew both of them her husband was loving and caring, so was her daughter. It was a complete family. Then why is Aru getting into this relationship, I wondered, but never thought she needed advice. She was very decisive and firm in what she decided. Its her life and she knows how to handle, I just hoped she never falls out of her marriage and her family life never gets disturbed.

``So what have you thought,'' I asked. ``Can you continue with two relationships together? Wont it be unfair on your marriage?''

``I have not thought of this as a relationship at this point of time, but yes, I cant say what will happen in some time. I like him a lot, he is too good and I look forward to his calls. It feels good to reconnect with him after such a long time. We have discussed all about the past years and I dont know why, but he has made it clear from day one that he still loves me. He had said that he has never been able to get over me in all these years and he will continue to love me till he dies. And when I told him that I love my husband more than anyone else in this world, he said , ``that is absolutely fine. I dont want anything in return, mine is unconditional love. Just be with me,'' he keeps saying. But one thing am sure, I can be as close to him without the fear of being taken for a ride or exploited. I know, my life is complete with my husband and daughter but some unknown force within me is taking me close to him. The same fondness still exists between us,'' Aru kept on saying and I had to disturb her in between.

``Aru, you are a sensible girl, I know you wouldn't do anything whimsically. I also know you think not from the mind but from the heart. Still, you will never cause damage and pain to anyone. You are balanced enough to know if you can continue with this or put a full stop. Take some time and think,'' I said her.

She took the last sip from the coffee cup and smiled at me. ``I will meet you in some months again and tell you more about my life,'' she said and dropped me at my office without uttering a single word on the way.